Disney Villains Rally Behind Wichita Homeless Encampment
WICHITA- As Wichita city manager Dennis Marstall oversees the destruction of a local homeless encampment, several Disney villains have reached out to Republicringe in a show of support for the encampment and the residents that called it home.
Jafar was the first to reach out to us “Trust me, I get wanting to rule over the masses… but even I didn’t kick them out of where they were living.”
Scar chimed in as well “Ruling is indeed the lifestyle of the chosen. I even killed my own brother to get there. But that was quick and mostly painless, I didn’t bulldoze anyone’s dens or anything… that’s just cruel and unsophisticated.”
When given a chance to respond to the outcry, Dennis Marstall replied “Look, this is all within my power and duties as city manager. It’s called manifest destiny and it’s what this country was founded on, maybe you’ve heard of it?”
Republicringe’s fact checkers quickly got back to reporter Wulfen Blitzen about the manifest destiny claim, and confronted Marstall about it “Our fact checkers are saying you’ve been in Kansas for less than a year.”
“Yeah? So what? How long has the encampment been there huh? A couple weeks?” Marstall retorted.
“For over a decade.”
Another villain nearby that reached out to Republicringe, Syndrome, got a disgusted look on his face as this information came in, he just looked at Marstall and whispered “Jesus Christ…”
Marstall scolded Syndrome as he stormed off, mumbling something about “not even a Disney villain…”
However, there was one Disney villain that reached out to Republicringe in support of Marstall’s efforts. Judge Frollo, infamous for removing homeless people from the city streets, made a declaration of support for the destruction of the encampment “Marstall is a brave man, finally doing what Paris never had the stomach for. Now the more privileged of us won’t have to look at the vermin.”
We certainly hope we don't have to tell you that we didn't interview a bunch of Disney villains... but just in case- All quotes and events in this article are made up